Before I start writing, you should know that my family, although conservative, is not “Dresses/skirts only.” I wear jeans nearly every day and I rarely wear skirts, usually only to dances. You should also know that these are my own personal opinions.
“Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.” -1 Corinthians 6:19-20
I think it’s wrong to be hyper conservative and legalistic by telling girls that they cannot wear jeans, that they are sinning if they wear them. (By the way, they get this from the verse, “A woman shall not wear a man’s garment, nor shall a man put on a woman’s cloak, for whoever does these things is an abomination to the LORD your God.” -Deuteronomy 22:5) I, however, am not saying that it is wrong to wear skirts all the time.
I believe it is important to dress modestly with men and young boys in mind. Their minds do tend to wander, sometimes caused by clothing that we, as girls don’t think about. “But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” -Matthew 5:28 I want to take you by piece of clothing, along with my brother’s thoughts and input and tell you what WE see as appropriate or inappropriate. As a general rule, given one time by my choir instructor, “If you look in the mirror and think, ‘Man! I look hot!’ don’t wear it.” That’s not to say you can’t ever wear something nice, just watch it.
Shirts: Tank tops are the one thing I wish I could wear, because we all get hot in the summer and would love to throw on a much cooler, more comfortable tank top. I have asked my brother (16) and my dad if I could even just wear it around the house and got a no from both of them. Tank tops show your bare arms and, most of the time, your bra straps. My brother said that it gives off a bad opinion of you, and it’s distracting. When I put on a shirt I make sure it doesn’t show my shoulders, my bra straps or cleavage, or my belly.
Pants: Like I mentioned, I think we can wear pants and still be appropriate. In fact, I think that sometimes pants are even more appropriate than skirts. I don’t wear tight fitting pants, pants that show off my shape. I don’t like skinny jeans (personally, I can’t fit in them, but I don’t even like them on other girls.) I do understand wanting pants to tuck into your boots, but find some loose enough. I don’t see anything wrong with shorts, but we don’t allow them up past a few inches above your knees. Super short shorts are definitely a no no. Skirts don’t go above our knees.
Shoes: I can’t think of anything wrong with shoes, however, some people have an inch limit on heels, especially if you are also wearing a shorter skirt, because heels make your calves tighter and more attractive. I don’t wear heels, just because I don’t. Personal preference, not a conviction.
Swimsuits: If I could find one, I would wear a t-shirt while swimming, but they’re nearly impossible to find unless you’re 5. Bikinis are completely inappropriate. I mean, how’s it any different than wearing a bra and underwear out of the house??? I prefer tankinis if I can find one that fits right, or a one piece. And I always wear shorts. I feel uncomfortable if I don’t.
Tattoos, Makeup and Jewlery: I don’t agree with tattoos or piercings. “You shall not make any cuts on your body for the dead or tattoo yourselves: I am the LORD.” -Leviticus 19:28 My ears are pierced. I got them pierced in grade school. I let my holes close, except they didn’t close all the way because I was able to get earrings in recently. At this point, I would not pierce them again, and likely wouldn’t allow my future children to pierce theirs. And tattoos are just dumb. Why would you inject ink into your body? And it’s a lot of work to get rid of it. And when you get old and wrinkly… Eww. I don’t have a problem with jewlery, just don’t wear a lot of it. It looks kind of ridiculous. Makeup: I wear barely any. My brother said there is nothing wrong with makeup. Just, again, don’t over do it.
Headcoverings: The Bible says to cover your head when you pray. And you are supposed to be praying constantly, therefore, you should always wear a headcovering. We don’t. I believe you can pray without your head covered. It’s not like God is going to choose to not listen to you because your head is not covered. Some friends of ours are so strict as to say that they are not allowed to pray if they don’t have a head covering on. I think that’s sad.
Modesty in Men: We so often talk about girls being modest to protect your Christian brothers. But guys are not the only ones prone to lust! Magic Mike is proof of that. I recently brought this up to my dad. I asked him why guys can wear their shirts off. He said, “Because we get hot.” I said, “Okay, girls get hot too. But why can’t we take our shirts off?” “Um, because, um, guys have an attraction to women’s chests.” “Yes, you’re right. And we respect that, that’s why we don’t take our shirts off, even if we are burning up. But girls have an attraction to guy’s chests.” “They do?” I think it has become such a part of our culture for guys to go shirtless that no one thinks about it. But what girl doesn’t blush at a picture of shirtless Channing Tatum? If guys look at a picture of a naked woman it’s called porn, but it’s more than okay for teen girls to have posters of shirtless boys all over their bedroom walls. Why in the world is this okay? Guys, we would really appreciate it if you would keep your shirts on. And Speedos and tank tops are just disgusting.
Girls and guys, you CAN be “in” and look nice, while still dressing modestly. I promise. Besides, if your future spouse is a good one, they’re gonna find what’s on the inside more attractive than the outside. Girls, check out this Modesty Survey by over 1,600 teen boys.
Mom’s Article on Modesty
A Very Good Video on Swimsuit Modesty and the History of the Bikini